would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.