My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
