yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize