I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
