i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
