remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
