his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize