A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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