Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Acid is not a monday night drug
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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