just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
