Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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