I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
