If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
