I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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