I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
My ass is underappreciated
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
