Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
