I cannot find my penis.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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