no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize