It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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