I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
