So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
