I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
