Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize