the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
