It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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