Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
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