so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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