he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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