where am i from again
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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