which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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