I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
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I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
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Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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