can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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