Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Randomize
