I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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