They should really pass out barf bags in church
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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