its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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