Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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