I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
