so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize