I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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