Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize
