I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize