this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
