You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
