he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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