So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize