it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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