do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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