weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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