I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
