ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize